Sunday, September 11, 2011

I enjoy having conversations where nothing is said.

My thoughts tend to sound better in books I didn’t write. At times I find that pictures and images do describe a moment in the most perfect way – shame I lost my camera so cannot take many great shots with my phone (will try and replace it soon).

While alone, I have everything written out, every sentence, every phrase, but again, they are only in my mind. You see, I wanted to be a writer. To describe in words the scenes that I see daily. To share them with those that did not see them or encounter them in such a perfect way that they could appreciate them. I am not near to being a writer. I cannot describe a scene perfectly at all.
I later realized that images tell it all. With no words, you can tell a story with images. I love taking pictures and I am still looking forward to taking my best shot. Someday, Somewhere, Sometime I will.

But again in my mind, in my thoughts, I see all clearly. I can describe it while silent. I can see it when I am alone and the world is still. That’s why I love being alone with my thoughts. I write lots of books in my mind. Every detail is mapped out. And it helps if the entire world is still and quiet too.

3AM is my favorite time of the day. I wish I could tell you why, but I really don’t know. I wish I could explain what it is about staying up late, but I don’t think that I could. I wish people would stop looking at me like that when I wake up tired at times in the morning. I wish I could sleep during the day and stay up all night—not because I want to miss out on anything, no, but because the night is quiet and still in the most perfect way— that’s stillness, that quietness, that silence when the entire world is quiet is my best time.

In my mind, I write books, in my mind, I map out everything, even this blog, I always write in the wee hours of the morning. I just cannot explain it and I have no right images to post or right words to use. But in my mind, I just know it.

I have never been a fan of crowds. I feel comfortable alone. I can be in a crowded place and still feel lonely – not that I don’t have many friends, I honestly have great friends but I can skip a party to be alone with my thoughts.
I enjoy having conversations where nothing is said. Where two people are together and just comfortable knowing the other is there but no words are said between them. Just enjoying the silence. Or both listening to music or reading a book but no conversation. I  just cannot explain it any further. I wish I could.
And now that it’s past 5AM, the world is going to wake up, the peace and silence is going to be disrupted.  I can go to sleep feeling happy now! ;D

2 comments:

Afyanor said...

This reminds me of a certain past life that taught us "meditation". Its seems to me like you took this up as a lifestyle.
Incidentally, i also like the silence in life... which is why i find time to blog even the mumbo jumbo that should come out better in words than in writing.

I hope this is not what pple call being a loner-101.

You have chucked the Dynamics template for blogger... oba why? It still looks cool to me. Though i guess you are missing the gadgets
and the top navigation bar.

Innocent Kazooba Ka'Nyamuhanga said...

Thanks Afya. True about the dynamics template. I prefer to have a some fair unique look. As for being a loner, I guess I am. Ever wonder how our generation will be in old age?? Imagine your grand kids telling their friends that their grand Pa is online or worse still facebooking. I just keep wondering.